I am not sure if the council are the right ppl to fix it. Please don’t spend money on our behalf without our permission. I have looked into some people to fix it, Gavin also knows a good person for the job. What we would like would be stay in London for a while, for various reasons. I don’t know if your house is available.
Yes we need money for bills and other repairs, even the wiring which was no good before we moved in and the hole in roof which was there before. I don’t really want your money, we do need money for these things, Gavin and I have been well on our way, in terms of work and to making money so this so -called’treatment’ has been unececessary and detrimental in terms of our life and our plans, then we have to pick up the pieces and get on with it afterwards. We get our lives back and get on our way, and we would have to do it again, but hopefully withouht the nhs and pls on our case dragging us back, that is no good. We do not want that, it seems to me that can decide that want to lock someone up just on a whim even, and ppl other people don’t question that a0tbecause they are too scared to or B they may actually believe that the dr is king, the highest power or something like that and worship them,- but that kind of thing is falling out of fashion these days.
In terms of money, the thing is you offered to pay for our van but then you phoned me up all angry and gave me a hard time about it, it was not nice.
Gavin and I are are supposed to be working, he has been happy and doing well until you and the authorities, I am working too, but who is paying us for Gavin being in the hsptl and for visits etc? and then you can turn around and say demeaningly and accuse me and G of ‘having no money’ and ‘you can’t afford it’. Well that is a situation you seem to have created yourself, and if you don’t want to help thenlet us be and we are quite happy making our own money and getting on with our lives.Which we do in any case. Controlling our money in the way you do is not going to help the situation, if you actually have Gavin’s and mine best interests at heart, and controlling our lives is not going to help us either, I mean hsptl is expensive in this respect and you don’t appreciate that, in terms of travel, phone calls, all sorts of hundreds of costs, and do we get anything for it? a tablet?
We have only been poor because of that but we won’t be any more. those hospitals and plc don’t like people making their own money, they seem to be stopping people in this respect and forcing them to go on benefits instead, but that is nothelpful. It might be helpful to the staff, but not to us, if you see what I mean. The thing is, I am not sure if benefits are available any longer, so hopefully they can see sense and let us get on with our lives and work. I am sure those staff can retrain in some sort of low-skilled job bothering people / nosey parking or even better shelf-stacking.
Pls and the Nhs decided to make our life hell, I can say that prior to the accident he was well, and since that unfair and unjust hospitalisation he had been getting what you might call ill, as it is nice for anyone to be in that situation and any reaction would be used as an excuse as ‘illness’. I mean he first got ‘ill ‘ and send to a ‘dr’ as a result of losing his job in the wine trade! he loved that job, and it is very surprising that he wasn’t helped to find a new job instead. Often people who lose their jobs have all sorts of reactions, which is normal, it is not nice for them, losing your job is not an illness, is it, there are plenty if jobs to be had, e.g job centre as you very bluntly put it to me once. apart from all that, there is no money in being in treatment is there? sometimes people even get ‘unfair dismissal’ and get their job back that way for example. they do no get sent to the Priory.
Yes, we asked if you could sent him to the priory a few weeks ago, because they were messing about with his medicine, which he already come off and was well, as a result of this the withdrawal symptoms can be quite nasty, as a psychologist friend explained, and our research so we though he could get better from this in the Priory as the ER is not a nice or helpful environment, and not a good place to come off the drugs. that clozapine was also having terrible side effects, therefore he ought to come of the drugs, all sorts of things, even diabetes can occur. They don’t tell you about withdrawal symptoms, but you can look it up for yourself. They prefer to act like someone is ill. They even said ‘oh it’s a new drug and very good – actually it is about 40 years old! (appearently they are not allowed to administer that drug without permission either).The priory have addictions treatment for prescription drugs. My psychologist friend who has a phd in the subject told us about a new place in London which can deal with such matters, I’m not sure what the charge but Gavin could get some sort of sponsorship or waiver, she said it’s very effective. (but not available o NHS, surprisngly enough!) I even discuss the issue with a nurse at the priory and
she understood, so, Gavin and I have done a lot of research into the matter so you can’t say that’s crap because you can look it up for yourself.
I want Gavin discharged ASAP as that would be the best thing for his health and our wellbeing, but you have been helping in this regard at all I would appreciate it if you did, If you do indeed have Gavin’s and mine wellbeing in regard. then we can get on with our lives and our work. as to your previous letter which said:’I hate this silence’ and then offering us money we had been away at time, I hope we do not need to justify our movements as we don’t expect others to, I mean it is intrusive, we have a private life just like anybody else so please don’t expect us to tell you things that are private, and don’t get in a huff if we don’t, because as i said before, we don’t question how you spend your money do we? and if it’s needless we don’t jump down your throat do we?
Apart from that, I said to Gavin he ought to see you once he was outside, and not that as you seem to have said to him that I don’t allow you to see him outside so you see him in hospital. We have a life as I’m sure you do, and it’s unfair of you to expect us to drop everything when you request, but not the other way round, which you and the family don’t appreciate. We would also like to live where we want, and not where we are told to, this kind of controlling behaviour from yourself and your family is detrimental to anyone’s health, unhelpful, and would of course lead to someone going to hospital in terms of how you see it. if you want to help us, please stop this kind of controlling behaviour!
Apart from that I’m not sure why you make flying visits in the middle of the day because you have other plans, an hour or two late and of twenty mins approx. I think you don’t want Gavin to get close but that is not my concern, however that sort of thing is not respectful, and your hospital visits and detrimental comments really seem to upset him, that’s why I said he should see you outside and not in the hospital because it’s not good for hime as he doesn’t feel great afterwards, and then someone i.me has to feel with it. i think you only support him when you think something is right, and not him, and you must remember that it its his life and our life and at his age you should not be telling him how to live it and trying to control the situation nor drag me into it. We have human rights too, despite the fact that what you call ‘mental illness’ is ill treatment, violence and drugs and bullying, due to rascism and because he is not like the staff and patients in terms of education or class and neither am I. We deserve to be treated with respect. Any labels in terms of treatment ought to be seen for what they are, unjustifiable treatment which is ignored.
Why would I be angry with you, gavin and I don’t want to get used or exploited, but treated with respect that we deserve. I don’t want to be fighting over him either which seems to be the situation you want to achieve is it not? Please let him grow up and let us be Rachel. take us seriously, and if you actuallydo want to help and want the best outcome for G, as you’ve said, please help get him discharged ASAP. Hospital is not the right place for him or anyone for that matter. you yourself might like to visit those place bit see yourself in on for a period of time.
You know my father before he died had a car accident and needed a blood transfusion and a bone mended or something, and he was begging me to help him get out out of there, but was he there for me before? i guess he saw for himself what it was like.He died a couple of years later, I think he was happy, he was not in this country and not in a hospital and had his family with him, and where was I, in Ireland, due to a ‘stop and search’ at border control, and who was there for me? and G? Not you. I thought you and the family would have seen sense by now about the situation.
On Sep 22, 2014, at 12:24 PM, email@example.com wrote:
I gather you saw Gavin on Thursday. I talked to him today, he sounds much calmer. Hopefully, he will be home soon.
My concern is, the state of the roof. Has the council been to see it? As it is a listed building, it cannot be altered without permission. I know, through your Lawyers, via M M & S, that the council will fix it. With winter coming on, it must be dealt with!! Can you contact them? It is not something Gavin can do. Likewise, your boiler, both need specialists.
Please do not be angry with me. We both want the best outcome for you and Gavin. Love, Rachael.